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Feigning normality since 1973

Fox Movies' Rudeness

Filed in: TV & Movies.

I got the Alien vs Predator Extreme Edition DVD for my birthday. The first thing that happened when I popped it in to my DVD player was it played an anti-piracy advert at me. You may know the one: "You wouldn't steal a handbag... You wouldn't steal a car... You wouldn't steal candy from a baby..." Though given the apparent intelligence displayed by whoever came up with this idea, I think the last one is an accurate comparison.

Come on! If someone's just forked out $40 to buy their crummy DVD, it should be obvious that they're not actively engaged in downloading movies from the Internet. I shouldn't need reminding that the MPAA is desperately broke and losing money hand over fist from people downloading movies en-mass... oh, wait, they aren't.

That said, pressing 'chapter forward' skipped to the FBI warning. HA! Take that, grossly misleading MPAA propaganda!

Y'know, I saw self-same ad recently as well. I went to look at the trailers on another DVD, and (rather than launching into the first trailer) the DVD started playing the self same advert at me. I ejected the disk and didn't bother watching the trailers. HA!

Today's rant brought to you by Fox Movies. Cheers, guys! I didn't think I'd have anything to write about today.

Posted September 20, 2005 7:49 PM


At least they've stopped using that piracy warning that states without the slightest shred of evidence that....


This ludicrously unbelievable canard in videoclip form was dropped after about ten minutes, mainly because even the people who made the clip knew it was total bullsh*t.

Picture a cave in Pakistan. Osama sits within, plotting the downfall of anything fun. Enter Ak Khak Pakhakh, his deputy in evil.

AK: Oh great leader, scourge of the Great Satan, ye of badly functioning kidneys, I come with news to lift your spirits.

O: Speak, my comrade in desert-based plotting.

AK: I have received word that our masterplan has succeeded! Succeeded beyond all hopes!

O: You mean....

AK: Yes! Our bootleg copies of Shark Boy And Lava Girl In 3-D have netted us millions of the hated Americans' dollars!

O: This IS splendid news!

AK: Not only will we be able to purchase the suitcase nuke from the Russians, we shall also be able to get your La-Z-Boy fixed!

O: That squeak in the recliner handle was irking me, I shall not deny it.

AK: Are there any more orders, my Cat Stevens-like master in all things violent?

O: Yes! The time has come to take the gloves off, as the filthy Zionist American pigs say. Place on the black market our shot-from-inside-a-cinema Handicam copy of War Of The Worlds!

AK: The one where we get a shot of the back of some guy's head for half the film?

O: The very same! Now, let us laugh in a protracted and diabolical fashion.

AK & O: Muahahahahahahahahaha

(lightning flashes, thunder rumbles)

O: I didn't know lightning could be generated inside a cave...

The Masked Comic

Posted by: The Masked Comic | September 24, 2005 2:40 AM


Posted by: Alden Bates | September 24, 2005 10:03 AM

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